Hail Seitan

...because I had to use that title, at least once.

Seitan is 'wheat meat' a kind of fake meat made from nutritional yeast and mashed beans, usually, with various other flavourings and ingredients to get slightly different textures and tastes.

Incidentally, I am very sick of omnivores being puzzled about why veg*ns make fake meats. I didn't give up meat because I didn't like the taste, all right?

Anyway; this recipe is adapted from one on Vegan Dad's blog, which he adapted from Isa.

Ingredients

1/2 Cup Cannellini Beans (rinsed and drained)
1 Vegetable Stock Cube, dissolved in one cup of water (I am lazy)
1 Tbsp Olive Oil
1 Tbsp Soy Sauce
2 Cloves of Garlic, grated or finely chopped
1 1/4 Cups Vital Wheat Gluten (I ordered mine from here a while back)
1/4 Cup Nutritional Yeast
Seasonings - I used Sage, Oregano, Parsley, Paprika, and Onion Salt.

1.  First, drain the cannellini beans, and put half a cup of them into a mixing bowl (incidentally, half a cup is about half a tin - I suggest using adding the rest to baked beans, to make them super proteiny).  Mash them until no whole ones are left.  I used a potato masher.

2. Add the vegetable stock. You could use homemade vegetable stock, but I haven't gotten around to making any of that yet. The vegan stock cubes I've found are incredibly salty, which is why I halved the soy sauce from Vegan Dad's recipe. That, and the addition of the onion salt.

3. Add the olive oil, soy sauce, and grated garlic. Mix together with a fork, and add the nutritional yeast.

Incidentally, grating garlic is a bit of a pain, so feel free to use garlic puree.

Photographing yourself grating garlic is even more of a pain.

4. Add in the vital wheat gluten, and stir until it forms a dough. This dough should be firm, and not really sticky.

5.  Finally, add the seasonings. I used, as I mentioned above, onion salt, paprika, oregano, parsley, and sage, but it's up to you.

6.  Once the dough is completely mixed, separate and wrap in tin foil.  I made five fauxages, and two patties, since I wanted to try this seitan as a burger.  Steam for forty minutes.

If you only have a vegetable steamer, like I do, swap the layers around halfway through.

The fauxages can be eaten as they are after steaming, but you can also cook them further - grill or fry them crispy, for instance, or add to other recipes. They're pretty good all by themselves, though. I'm planning to use them as part of my full English project.